Wednesday, February 09, 2005
not so much a change as a straightening of heart
many thanks to all of you married(and non-married)gals who weighed in with advice about the inevitable monotonies of relationships. as you all know, though i have been in many relationships in my day, this whole substantial/happy/long-term relationship thing is fairly new to me. i went to the superbowl party, i managed not pick a fight, J was very sweet and understanding about my funky panic mood, and though i did pick a fight with him the next morning, it was fairly short and non-destructive, and it gave me a chance to tell him what had been on my mind. (i know, i know, i'll work on being more direct and less passive aggressive. next time; i'm learning...) strangely enough, he loves me even though i am crazy and emotional. weird(wonderful)boy. reading everyone else's blogs, i have noticed the trend of waxing poetic about loved ones, and so i want to throw a little wax J's way. in short, he rocks. he is so patient and understanding and calm with me. he doesn't freak out when i am freaking out, he doesn't mind that i am emotional and obsessive, he makes me laugh, he makes me smile, he is always thinking and listening and so curious about people and the world around him. he cooks, he sings, he loves politics, he loves music, he loves to read. he makes me tingle when he kisses me and sometimes i catch him looking at me across a room and it makes me feel like the most important woman in the world. he is always there for me when i need him, and at the most important moment, when it would have been so easy for him to run away, he stood beside me and held me up. he loves my friends, my friends love him, my family loves him, and his family loves me. he admits that he is lazy, and he never calls me out for being lazy too. he is so loyal and generous and caring with his friends- he would step in front of a bus for any one of them. he acts like a little kid, and he is trying so hard to become an adult(and succeeding!). he likes to play. he loves my cats. he is everything i never knew i wanted, he is my best friend, and no, i could not imagine my life without him. i will gladly take the moments of annoyance, and doubt, and anger, and the boring/bored days if it means i get to be with him for the rest of my life. he is worth it, and even more so because he reminds me that i'm worth it too.
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3 comments:
So glad to see a giving J his props post! I've only met J a couple of times but I still want to jump on the let's throw J some love train. When I went out with you both in Chi, I mentioned to you that I could tell how much J thought of you by the way he treated your friends. That says a lot! Though he seems like a thoroughly modern guy, there is something very classic about him, like he belongs in an earlier time. I don't know, the 1940's or 50's maybe, he has that kind of cool, hip, suave thing going on. But I also think your style clearly harkens back to an earlier time of glamour, smoky bars and torch songs, this is a match made in heaven. Oh and he's really cute.
MAH
okay, so i wanna jump on the we-love-j bus too! last friday night i was upset and called what i thought was your cell but is really j's cell now. he was at work, it was late, and he was totally cool and even comforting though he probably didn't even know i was upset. but he was a total sweetheart and took the time to talk with me and make me feel totally loved...and i've only ever talked/seen him 3 times before. i just think that's pretty incredible. from the very first time i met him i thought he was pretty damn great, and then i was lucky enough to sit down with you guys on your last visit to the city and actually spend some time talking and getting to know him. i totally fell in love in that little sister idolatry of your sister's boyfriend kind of way...that "i want to find a man like that to marry one day" kind of way. i feel like whether or not he knows me well, if something horrible happened to me he'd be right there too, just because you love me. i think he might even be someone who'd drive to north carolina at 3am. i mean, he's no orphannie...there can be only one. but he's really great too, and i am so happy he's joining our little family of old friends and so happy you'll be spending the rest of your life together. i just wish you'd move to new york!
see, that's what i'm sayin- my friends love him too, and that is a very important perk...he love's you guys too, he's said so about both of you, and yes Synge, he is totally a north carolina friend, and he would help you guys out just because he knows that i love you. and about moving to NYC, we're working on it, it just may be a few years....
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